Loving other people isn’t a matter of emitting love rays but of demonstrating genuineness, warmth, empathy, and respect. For most of us, though, the few skills that we think we have in those areas can be more hurtful than helpful: “Oh, you shouldn’t worry about your son. He’ll grow out of it.” But in this book, Gary explains concrete, learnable skills that we can all use to demonstrate concern without trying to fix people: “It seems like things have been piling up on you, and you wonder what’s going to happen next.” That kind of response not only conveys warmth, empathy, and respect, but it also ensures that we don’t end up owning other people’s problems.
